This can never be duplicated nor replicated. In Memoriam: Whitney Houston 

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The heart can be a treasure-trove of secret ambition, dreams, goals, and desire. I've learned something about myself recently, I've learned that I have not fully worked this muscle, I've not fully stretched or even attempted to push it to it's capacity and beyond. In fact I've given way to my brain, relying solely on process, relying on only the things that make sense. However, the matters of the heart often stray from what makes sense, it diverts it's way from reason by its very nature. The things that cause my heart to beat full and true are things that I've kept down, kept dormant, kept hidden.

God does not call us to occupy a space governed only by what makes sense! In fact, he sent his son to the earth in a way that went against how we know a baby can enter this world. In the same way, God gives space for the heart to dream and create things that doesn't make sense to those around us and can anger some but has the potential to be life/world changing!

The capacity of the human heart is wide. It can love wide and deep. It can also be a catalyst to drive you, to move you forward if you let it. Dig up those put away dreams. Set free the frightening things that you've abandoned. Be brave. Dear heart, be brave!

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The interconnectivity in a relationship, whether strictly communal or deeper, should drive us to be more aware of how we interact. This should heighten our awareness of how far to push, how to embrace, how to put someone else first, and how to strengthen that relationship. Because people matter, the time spent communicating, loving, teaching, armor-bearing, is not something wasted but really, something gained. What we need is a paradigm shift into how we treat each other and how we GIVE ourselves to the needs of one another.

When someone matters to you, a fracture or a brokenness in the bond should bother you. It should bother you in such a way that you are left sleepless at nights and non-complete. When someone matters, they matter. I've seen where we try to one up each other; where we let the circumstance win despite what damage it causes. People break when they don't feel considered, acknowledged, respected, or needed. In fact, because they've been broken, they will operate out of that causing more damage to themselves and others around them. I've found that we can "break" people without knowing it, and we do that because we refuse to make ourselves keenly aware. We bulldoze our way into decisions without considering others, we alienate one another, we force our convictions on them, and we do all of these things with such heavy hands. At the end of all of this, the only relationship that you are left with is a Skeleton of what was once former. You've beaten and stripped that relationship down to where it's nonexistent; sometimes to where that persons light no longer exists.

People matter. Love on people. Go out of your way to genuinely affect someone that you care about in a way that communicates a deeper sense of love, a deeper sense of what they mean to you. me. Slow down on your approach. When people matter, clear communication is your goal, making sure they're ok is your goal, winning them is your goal, and the circumstance...well it will get fixed...or maybe it won't...but you wouldn't have ruined a relationship over trying to figure it out.

Love.

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"I love you Lord. And I lift my voice to worship You, o my soul, rejoice"

 

What would it take and what would it sound like to have the Father, to have God, call us up and meet him in a space where his presence instantaniously breaks off the chains and bondages and all of the dead things that we carry on and alongside us daily? What would that look like?

"Your grace is enough for me"

                                                          God.

                                         Up.

                        Me.

       Call.

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16 But Ruth said, "Don't force me to leave you; don't make me go home. Where you go, I go; and where you live, I'll live. Your people are my people, your God is my god;17 where you die, I'll die, and that's where I'll be buried, so help me God-not even death itself is going to come between us!"

Ruth 1:16-17

Loyalty, it seems, is often forgotten too quickly, too easily. It's easy to be loyal when things are going your way. It's easy to be loyal when you're getting what you want out of it. It's easy to be loyal when it suits you. It's easy. What happens, though, when the rubber meets the road, when a decision has to be made? What happens to loyalty when things get hard or when something better comes along?

I strive really hard to be loyal to the people I love, serve, and to those who have taken a vested interest in me. Over the years, I've learned that when someone takes time to pour into you and/or walk life with you, there should be a sense of "they chose me, I choose them". I call this reciprocating love.

Too often, I've found, people tend to "stick around" because they are getting their fill of what they need from you, never quite investing back what they are being given. Then when circumstances change, a girlfriend/boyfriend enters the picture, new friends, another job-related opportunity, they up and leave...forgetting where they come from and what time and effort someone has given toward their success. Give honor where honor is due. 

"Let your yes be yes" the bible says. You can find great stories of loyalty in the bible. Some of my favorites are the stories of Ruth and Naomi, and David and Jonathan. They said yes to each other and served each other all of their days. In fact, they were intentional about it. They fought for each other, were always striving for the best for each other, together; never leaving because the "grass was greener on the other side", even if it really was. <---(Thats a blog for another day)

Commitment and loyalty is deeply rooted in a person's integrity and without your integrity, you've got nothing. Reciprocate the love of others, reciprocate the tenacious commitment of those who love you and serve you because they understand that you are worth it. 

-M

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A few weeks ago, I wrote a blog called Fight For Your People where I discussed going all out for those that you believe in. Recently, I've been thinking about how much time you get to invest into someone and what you do with that time. Ive been thinking about how sometimes you get this rare opportunity to pour your entire self into someone to grow them and challenge them and push them forward even when they buck and fight back. 

I love it actually, its what invigorates me, it energizes me. It brings the cosmos into focus for me in a sense. I typically go all out for someone that I believe in. That never fades for me. And in the season that God gives for me to walk along side that person, yes there are seasons, I've learned to be able to learn their story, their vision, their goals, wants, and help drive them towards it. 

When that season ends though, you've got to let them go. You've got to trust the foundation that you've helped them build. And if you've invested your soul into that relationship, it may seem that everything has gone to crap when they leave. And thats ok...a "leaving" hurts. However, you have to look deeper into the divine plan. Sometimes, it takes a letting go to remind you of the things that make you, you. Its a huge reminder of what makes you strong. It makes you wiser and better equipt to deal with the next person you need to pour into and let go of. And so on...and so on. 

You work and work, trying to teach those that are under you, those that you lead, to do the right thing. And you want to be so proud of them when they stand up for what they believe is right. But watching them destroy themselves, in order to do it, in order to be succesful in their dreams, to do what you've taught them, is just maddening. 

Yes, it can be maddening, maddening but so worth it when they come back to you and you get to celebrate all that they've accomplished with and without you. 

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Steven Furtick posted this tweet a couple of days ago:

"Go all out for the people you believe in. Treat them like there is no other option than for them to succeed"

I loved that. When I read it, I felt vindicated, justified, and encouraged. You may be asking, "what are you talking about Meeks?"

There is something to be said about going to bat for the people you love, for the people you see great potential in. In fact, you and I know this to be true, that we should fight for the sucess of those we are close to. We should strive for them to have opportunities to learn, to grow, and to develop. 

For the people that you believe in, you should be your best self- always in tune with the Lord, always vigilent and aware of the things that seek to harm them and take them down. You should always have time for them and space for them in your life. 

Fight for people. Fight for their happiness and their strength. Fight when they are weak but fight when they are strong. Defend them. Hold them in the highest regard no matter their position. Fight for them even when they've made a bad call or decision. Fight as if every part of their success relies on your ability to help guide them and shape them. 

Those are just a few thoughts. Here's my point, there are people around you that you believe in, that God has given you a profound vision for. I'm saying take that insight into someone's life and run the best race with them. Venture along side them. Fight for them, fight for your people. 

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But what happens when it gets harder for you to say it? What happens when it gets harder for you to receive it? You've been burned by a friend, family member, spouse, so much that the words you've often said become like boulders trying to escape your mouth. There some times when someone will press you down so much and stomp all over you so much that even though you do love them, you become jaded and less likely to want to commit so much of yourself to them. The challenge, in my opinion, is how long do you let things go on before you revitalize that relationship, repair it or let it go? My stamina in any kind if relationship is pretty good but I wonder sometimes what it takes to be sure that I don't fully lose the ability to say those words.

The only solution to this is forgiveness. Be quick to forgive an offense. Be quick to forgive an offense over and over and over.

A bruised heart can heal with time and effort.

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I've been thinking about building teams a lot lately (Read my Blog Who's On First) and with that I've been thinking about all of the things that can make a team sticky or make people want to stick around and be a part of that team. 

Here's the key in my opinion: share the heart of WHY they should be a part of the team.

I've found myself running around trying to fill positions and roles and needs all under the banner that if someone has is attending church or becomes a church member, they need to get plugged into a ministry; they need to serve on a ministry team. While this is correct- "home is where the heart is"- I wonder how often we miss the mark by not discussing the heart behind a ministry or why a team exist or why this may be a good fit. 

Its time that we start having Heart Conversations. Let us no longer simply invite people to serve or be a part of a team without sharing the heart behind it. The Heart is the reason for the team's existence or the ministry's vision. Why should someone get on board? In my case, as I develop teams in Youth Ministry or in Church Innovation, I need to be able to effectively communicate that we don't want you to show up on a wednesday night because we need someone to run lyrics or lights or open doors. We want you to show up because the souls of students are on the line. We want to love on students and be a place of encouragement. Do I want you to run lights and open doors and run lyrics? Sure, but I want you to do it because you understand that what you are doing impacts the overall goal of winning a generation.

Slow down, take a breather. We are very quick to catch the new members of a church or an organization and get them to join our teams because we have a need. I want you to understand that the people that you get to join your team will last longer because they understand the choices that they make to show up and be a part of, will ultimately effect where your ministry, organization, or whatever it may be, is headed. 

Let us no longer be so interested in filling a spot that we miss the opportunity to fulfill a desire in someone elses heart to be a change-agent, a person that effects the rest. So have those heart conversations with your teams. Build from the heart and extend out into the arteries and veins with how to accomplish what the heart seeks.

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Who's on first? Over the last few months I have been working hard to develop teams and team leaders for the ministries that I get to serve in. What I've found interesting is how many people are willing to step in and be a part of a team or head up a team. However, the question is always, are they the right person for the task. 

You know, in leadership, you are always taught to be good at delegating tasks and asking for help but rarely are there good lessons on making sure the right people are in the right place on your teams. In fact, if you don't get this right, you could potentially be adding more work for yourself rather than making things easier. The people that you put in place to help you run a ministry or be a team leader should be people that you trust to uphold the vision of the ministry and trust to run with it. 

So the vital question is Who's On first; who do you have at the helm? Is he or she the right person to do what you are asking? 

I've found that sometimes the person you choose is the right person as long as you do your due diligence in creating a solid base on which they can lead upon. Here are 3 thoughts I think can help with that:

1. Communicate the Culture of the Organization: You and those the serve under you in specific roles are subject to the culture of the ministry or organization that you are with. In fact, without effectively communicating this, a ministry and its team are bound to cause friction within itself and on the outside as it tries to align with the main heartbeat. It simply cant. Understanding and communicating your organization's culture is an important component of a culture by design.
2. Share the Vision: It is all about the vision. Where is this ministry going? What are the goals? What is the timeline for these goals? How are we getting there? These are important questions to answer with the person you've chosen to lead your team. By answering these, you are communicating the vision and have set the goals up front. With this being clearly communicated a new leader can run and drive your ministry forward according to YOUR goals.
3. Continuously Develop Your Who: Just becuase you have chosen someone to lead your team doesnt mean that your job is done. If your team or ministry will only go as far as its leader is willing or simply CAN go, then it won't go very far at all if he or she isnt continually being developed. It is YOUR job to make sure that you are taking time to shape and develop those under your leadership, even when you've placed them in a position to lead. There are always new things to learn, better ways to do things, things to tweak, and so on. Take the opportunity to fine tune those you've placed in a position of leadership. Be ok with their failures and mistakes as long as you are willing to craft beyond them. Provide opportunities for development by mentoring, coaching, and training on better ways to perform.  

Chew on some of these thoughts while you are looking to place someone on first, on first base. 

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Check out why I am absolutely LOVING facebook lately!

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Its a hard lesson to learn and few will choose to do it.Yesterday, I was riding in my car with one of our Fulfill the Call ministry students and he and I began a conversation about cherishing our leaders. One of the themes of this conversation was the way that we show honor and the way that we show appreciation to those we seek to serve.

I told him, one of the hardest lessons to learn for so many people is the lesson of pouring into those who pour into you. Lets face it, to those of us who spend our whole lives on pouring into people, we often do it without any reciprocation, without any encouragement. If you're doing it right, you're exhausting yourself in the process. In fact, if you're doing it right, you may often find that you are constantly thinking of ways to encourage those you're pouring into, teachable moments, hangout times, opportunities for that someone to grow and mature. This takes a lot out of you. The reward is never clear and is seldom given until kingdom comes haha!

Here is the lesson: Pour into those who pour into.

Here's what that looks like: Honor them. Show them respect. Pray for them. Choose them. Hold them in high regard. Serve them. Bear their armor. Love on them. Gain their vision and seek to propel that vision forward. Let no harm come to them. Defend them. Defend their actions and their words. And sometimes, just say thank you.

We can get so self-gratifying and so inward that we forget that the people who are serving us and pouring into us have needs and feelings as well. I've seen this a lot, people being poured into will love only as long as they are getting what they want. What happens when we push that fleshly state down and say "someone has committed to me to help me grow and mature and so I am going to show him or her honor"? I think fulfillment in the community of it all happens. I think it all comes full circle. The relationship is strong and healthy. Its people serving each other. Its balanced and equal. 

It’s a hard lesson to learn and few will choose to do it. Its hard work. It takes you dying to yourself for the sake of others. At the end of the day, though, you will be rich in this space of community and in your relationships between you and your mentor or leader. 

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Men are not prisoners of fate, but prisoners of their own minds.  ~Franklin D. Roosevelt

This is a story about the shirt. Yea, you read that right. It’s a bit of a love story between me and a shirt at my favorite clothing store, Urban Outfitters. For months now, every time I walk into the store, my eye immediately catches this shirt and I imagine all of the possibilities of outfits that would go with it. For months I’ve wanted it and for months I've denied myself from getting it. I’ve struggled with spending the money. In and out is how it goes and the results are that I never purchase it. I war with myself each time that I am in the store; it’s a serious internal struggle. 

I know that that is pretty surface what I just said but is it? Maybe it’s not about the shirt.

Lately I've been studying a lot of issues concerning my humanity, my human side- the side that leans more flesh than spirit, more carnal than God focused. I've found that deep within myself, there is a war happening. Its not one that’s full of precision bombers ands rockets and guns, and its not the kind we hear often in sermons the war between our flesh and the spirit, but its a war with me. I’m literally warring with myself. My mind is a battlefield that is littered with hidden explosives of emotions and intelligence, know-how and insecurities, hope and deep sorrow, boldness and fear.  

Ok, let me explain it like this: You know those times where you say, "I want to be more confident", and the opportunity presents itself for you to be more confident and your whole soul is screaming, “take your shot, be confident, now's your chance”.... but you don't. You remain afraid. Or how about this one, You want something or you want to be a part of something, and the conversation comes up again just like it has 20 times before and its the perfect opportunity to speak up and say "choose me"...but you don't. You remain silent. Ok, ok, one more. What about the times where you want love reciprocated from a friend or just want to be appreciated in the way that you'd receive it. This time the opportunity never shows up, in fact you go days, months without getting anything from that person. Anger, resentment, bitterness, offense rises up in you...and although you tell yourself not to, you give in to these emotions. You take it...all the while telling yourself no. This is what I like to call warring with yourself. 

When is it time to say I give up, I retreat, I give up on being so engulfed in my mind by all of these thoughts and I just give in to the spirit of God? How do you reach that homeostasis? I'm going to be thinking and posting about this over the next few weeks. Lets see where it takes us...let me know your thoughts by leaving a comment. 

Its a little more than just a shirt. 

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Over the last couple of weeks, I've really been thinking a lot about friendships. Not just the term or the meaning but the relationship aspect of it all. I've always been a stickler and a sucker for really good friendships and making sure that I was in the business of building and cultivating and strengthening them. Additionally, I think about this often.

I think about the things that make a friendship good; the things that work and don't, that draw you closer and separates you. In my thought process, I observe relationships that I see around me and their ebb and flow. And I often come across that kinda sorta friendship. 

Kinda-Sorta-Friendship- Here's how I define this. These kinds of friendships are the ones that hold the title but don't necessarily hold the substance, the content, the drive, the build, nor the community. These are the friendships that are the "I'll see them whenever" or the "I dont have to see them, but when we do connect, its fun" or the "I call them my friend but that doesn't mean that we are always together or that I share everything with them". 

Some of these things are so foreign to me because I usually don't enjoy being not-connected to my friends. I love the ability to do live together. And what that means is getting into the nitty gritty of life. What are the things that make you tick? What are the loves and the hates? What happened yesterday? Whats going on today? What do you have planned for tomorrow? What are your dreams & desires? Those are the answers I seek. In a kinda sorta friendship, you dont really get into all of that; you never get into the deeper places of a person? 

There's such great community in a one on one friendship. If you do it right, if you invest the time and the energy, there is such great strengthening and sharpening to be gained from your friend. And not that kinda sorta friend, but that friend who says to you, Im gonna love you in the deeper realms of life and walk beside you through it all. Yea, its hard. Its exasuting. In the end, though, the reward of knowing you have a person, is so much greater.

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1+1=2

By yourself you're unprotected. With a friend you can face the worst. Can you round up a third? A three-stranded rope isn't easily snapped. -Ecclesiastes 4:12

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The Win: The win is the identifiable goal of the actual production. What is the point? What is the take away? 

As a producer and being heavily involved in Student Production, I often find myself running around on the day and night of our event trying to shore up lose ends and make sure people are in place. Although, its pretty much my job, it's not something that is sustainable. Keeping at the pace and work ethic, you'll (I'll) soon find myself weary and empty and not really functioning as the Lord has called me to function. 

Producing worship services requires us to have the win in mind always. One thing that I like to do is to seek out from our Speaker/Preacher/Teacher what the sermon and altar time is going to be about. With this information, I can get a good idea of the goal of the night and then structure everything that we do around it. We try to make sure that the entire event drives towards this win and encorpoartes the theme of the evening. 

Having identified the Win, I'm able to really structure out my week and and plan effectively what needs to get done and by who. If producing the Win is the goal then all of your production meetings are centered around that. Every task that you complete for your event is solely focused there. If this is accomplished then you, if you have planned and executed, then during your event you should be able to just coast...knowing every moment, every transition, every cue is driving the event straight toward the win. 

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