Do I Not Still Satisfy
Have you ever been in a space where you looked around and felt like there could just be so much more than this? Have you ever been surrounded by the feeling of being underwhelmed by your situation? Ok, well, maybe it isn't that dramatic. Have you ever just wanted something different?
A few weeks ago, I received a call in the middle of my Friday and if you've followed me for any given amount of time, you'd know that Friday is my most productive day. I knock out projects left and right. The call came when I had about 2 more hours of work time left. It was my direct report, Mike. "Meiko, what are you doing right now", he said. I replied, "Nothing". I wasn't doing nothing of course, it was that arbitrary answer you give when obviously you are working but you know that's not what they are asking. "Would you mind going to pick up Pops? He just got out of the hospital and is waiting on the street near KFC and needs to go pick up his Prescriptions from the drug store." I reply with a quick, "absolutely". The call continued with a few instructions. I picked up a credit card, jumped in my car, and went searching for a man who I had met only a couple of weeks prior for less than 30 seconds.
I found him. I found him just where Mike said he'd be, at KFC. In my heart I thought to myself, here is my chance to really help out Mike and serve him while he was out of town. I'm going to be the best pick-up-a-guy-off-the-street-and-get-him-medicine-and-drop-him-back-off-er!
I stepped out of my car to say hello and asked Pops if he remembered me from our brief introduction only a few weeks ago across the street at Starbucks. He did. I took his bag that he had been holding that had an unbelievable stench to it and a stick...a walking stick it seems that had been very important to him. I opened the car door to let him in and I placed his things in the back seat.
You see, Pops was homeless. Suffering from Colon cancer, he had been in and out of the hospital a lot this year. Several years ago, doctors diagnosed him with Cancer and told him that he only had so long to live. That time has come and gone and he's still ticking! In fact, this time around at the hospital, the Doctor was still amazed that he was alive and Pops made a deal with him that if he made it to his next birthday next year, that doctor is to buy him a big dinner at a place of his choosing! I loved that.
As we drove to go pick up the medication from a local Walgreens, me being me, I began asking questions to determine why Pops was homeless and how he dealt with cancer. He told me his story with remarkable detail. Our drive was a quick ten minutes but in that short time, I felt God saying to me: "This is my heart...do this in remembrance of me". I couldn't shake the voice of God in my heart.
We arrived at Walgreens finally and picked up his medicine. The pharmacy was less than nice and respectful to Pops. Having heard God's voice in the car, I really felt the need to step up and defend him. You see, I could tell that because of how he was dressed and the odor, she didn't see him as valuable. She didn't regard him as someone that you should show care to. It's interesting because when I spoke up, her tone changed, her demeanor changed. So I was his defender and we got the medication that he needed. It took over an hour but we got it. Afterwards, I took Pops to get something to eat since he hadn't eaten anything since the hospital stay. He was grateful.
Now Pops is homeless and so I needed to figure out where he wanted me to drop him off. So I asked, and he told me his spot. And I dropped him off. He stepped out of the car saying a few jokes. I laughed and watched him walk away into what seemed like a forrest of nowhere. My heart broke.
Did I help? Did I make a difference? Did I care enough? Remember I said, I really wanted to do this because I wanted to serve Mike and be the best pick-up-a-guy-off-the-street-and-get-him-medicine-and-drop-him-back-off-er! In this moment of watching Pops walk away, I realized more than doing something for my boss...I was doing a real ministry. I was serving Jesus. It wasn't about Mike or my pride or my wanting to be "doing more". It was about the heart of God.
Often, we look for the next big thing! We're looking for bigger ministries that have greater impact. We want to be great. We want to have more influence. We want a bigger space than what we currently have. We want increase. And yet we fail to realize that it's the little things that make a big difference. We fail to just be whole and ok with where we are at. We forget to just serve a God and his people in the realms that he gives us...and do it faithfully.
Human Life was given for the love of God and the love of our neighbors in a local place for God's glory and the common good.
God recently spoke this to my heart and maybe it will speak to yours: "Do I not still satisfy?"