Watch Where You're Going
This weekend Meeks and I took a trip to the Promise Land (Florida of course), where we had the privilege of being a part of our dear friends' wedding. It was amazing and we were so honored to share that special day with them!
After we spent time celebrating their union, we journeyed a little further to St. Petersburg to spend some quality time with some sweet friends we hadn't seen in a while! After Chik-fil-a, beach fun, and chicken pot pie, (which was slammin' by the way!), we gathered around each other in the living room to settle into some good old fashion conversation. We caught up on each others present lives, teased and joked with each other, and then took a turn down memory lane. It was so interesting sitting and hearing my husband and our friends, who spent their young adult lives growing together, rewind their lives and replay the ups and downs of their pasts. I got to experience memories of funny stories, "I can't believe that happened" 's, and Fine Arts glory days.
At one point during the conversation however the air became a little thick with unanswered questions and heavy unsettled feelings on a matter that happened years ago. In the middle of witnessing these guys dig up and lay back to rest remnants of a tough season, I found myself drifting in and out. I started over-identifying with some feelings, and comparing and applying them to rough patches in my own friendship history. Drifting back in, I started empathizing with the pain that was all to real again to my husband and my friends. Then I thought about some notes I took from an IF:Gathering simulcast I read over in my journal earlier that morning.
Bianca Olthoff taught a session on running your race and she said something so profound. She said "Don't stumble over something behind you." First I had a "get over yourself this isn't even about you" moment and tightened up. And then I thought about how amazing it is that even in this moment God was healing dried up scars and wounds that they thought they were long over! And at the end of it all they were just as happy and loving as the moment we all were when they opened their doors to welcome us in their home for the day.
I think I realized that a lot of times in the process of moving forward we tend to stumble, trip, and even fall down over things that the Lord has helped put behind us. We can even be years ahead of our "something" and the slightest mention or memory of it can cause us to lose balance for just a while. And even in my moment of self pity and longing The Lord reminded me that this revelation applied to me too. When he heals us from the scrapes and boo boos we accumulate from falling down, he reminds us we've got to learn the route and watch where we're going... yes in our minds as well. Thats a big one for me.
Sometimes we can't always do that by ourselves. And one of the greatest gifts of friendship is the ability to shoulder on with each other. I saw that first hand that night. It reminded me of something else I heard... "Free people, free people." There is something that you and I carry in us that has the power of freedom that someone else needs.
So learn the route. We have got to be aware to watch for the bumps that make us stumble and be open for the helpful cautions I think God directs in our lives.